Why The Chicken Cross The Road???

I cannot TAHAN ade!

For a week I’ve been resisting temptation to open up a Word document to type/blog away - anything at all lah! Because I’m just so simply swamped with so many things! Not just work per se, but of course work is the main part of it all because it’s month end mah.

So yeah, I think I’m trying to like, bullet-train blogging here trying to cram as much as I can remember in here. So you can close your window hereon. You're not obligated to read. But if you do, I'll lub you long time! ;)

Let’s see, what happened during the past one week? Gee, time just flies so fast man! Ooo, last week was another Sony event where they had a VAIO up for lucky draw, again. Yeap, you guessed it, I’m not the winner -_- I know! The lappy’s all white and huge screen, and it went to a cheen… ok never mind. Don’t lah call people name, right? My bad. My bad.

So during the event something drama happened, which went like this: I was bored so I played with the press kit given out to us people from the media. I flipped open the file, took out all the documents, pretended reading a bit, acted in deep thought a little, then put it back, and repeated the whole process.

So by the 45346th times when I was doing that, I peeped too close into the file, and apparently my hands moved faster than my brain, and I poked the edge of the papers right into my eyes! And when I opened my eyes I was like, eh, why so blur? Good thing I have a habit of remembering my contact lenses every time something drama happens, so true enough, the edge of the papers that poke my eyes fished my lens out faster than lightning! But thank goodness it dropped on my lap and I managed to detect it!

Drama right?!

And then an uncle who was very bitter so we’ll call him Uncle Bitter, came and sat at my table, and started bickering away about the service of the hotel, the coffee house, the parking lots, the parking system, the country (I so scared some uniformed people will come and detain me, you know?), the hotel rating, the everything! And for an hour we sat listening to him. How sad right? I wished I poked my eyes then so at least I can excuse myself to go insert my eyeball back into the socket. Bleah!

Oh actually before the Uncle Bitter came along, we spotted an ultra yummy girl at the other end of the room and we were like, whoah, check that out! And when she came closer, my ed went like, uh, I think she ate too much! Cos her tummy was like, protruding out. So we stared on a bit, and suddenly something hit my head and I in return I hit his head with the file and shouted, hoi! Pregnant lah! Joh! -___-

But boy oh boy, she was sooo deliciously hawt even though she’s pregnant! She was in this slinky off shoulder gold fitting dress with a belt under her belly, and she was in heels! Just selamba like that strutting up and down the catwalk/stage. Professional right?! She’s also a proud owner of a sponsored VAIO lappy, paid to own it! See the things you get just by being P.R.E.T.T.Y? Haiks. Oh, did I mention? That’s Daphne Iking.

ANYway! I spotted one of the model who did the L’Oreal show some time back. He’s like so good looking, Asian for that matter, he’s an exact clone of Edison Chen! … or is it? Is Edison the cute one? Erm… the guy in Initial D. La La Laaa.

The next day I had to like join one of the road shows my company is running for a FMCG company, supposedly to interview the people who tried the drink. So this elderly uncle came along, looking all amused and befuddled at the same time. He was given a can of the drink, and started talking, like he’s high on alcohol or something.

Uncle: *mumble*mumble* I’ll buy all!
Me: Oh… so how do you like the drink? :)
Uncle: *mumble*mumble* I’ll buy all!
Me: Yeeah. What do you think about chocolate flavour? :)
Uncle: I have the money you know.
Me: I see… Do you like the chocolate flavour? Cos I think it’s really good. :)
Uncle: See. *take out a stack of cash from his pocket all bundled up using rubber band, whispering, wild eyed*
Me: … don’t you like the chocolate drink?

And then you get kiasu people like this girl.

Pigtailed Girl: I want the coffee flavoured *while holding a can of the chocolate flavour drink*
Promoter: How many cans? (all ready to pack the order)
Pigtailed Girl: No, I just WANT to TRY. I DON’T want to BUY!
Promoter: But… you can’t… you already have a can.
Pigtailed Girl: YEAH. But I just WANT to TRY! *virtual DUH*

Then she stormed off. O_o We DON’T want to SELL it to YOU also lah, miss PIG-tailed Girl!

And yet another lady, who came earlier to our booth, then left. Then returned.

Mung Bean Face: My colleagues want to try.
Promoter: *looks around locating her colleagues*
Mung Bean Face: My colleagues want to try! Can you give me a few cans?
Promoter: O_O uh, no?

What’s wrong with Malaysians?! So darn greedy!!!

I just feel like calling her mung bean face. Don’t ask why.

So that was… Thursday. No drama on Friday.

Friday was one of those days lah, I signed in to meebo, and then immediately Jap messaged me “This Sunday cancelled lah! ZZZzzz”

Like. Roll eyes. I came online to de-stress, and that’s the first thing you must tell me. I mean, I’m not angry or what about cancelling lah, just that, the whole sentence’s like soooo negative right? Ish!

We were actually planning for a movie marathon at our place, and for that, Jason, being the clean freak that he is (bless him!) insisted a thoroughly, squeaky, dust-free, everything-free, clean house to greet the visitors, that comes in the form of Jap, Dohny, and Elle-Jay. Like, its only Jap, Dohny, and Elle-Jay lah!

So yeah, you can clearly see how terrible a wife/hostess I am -_- Anyway we started from Monday, we were like, all fours after work, scrubbing and cleaning, all through Thursday (not Friday cos we attended the service with Ps. Dennis, and we stayed over at my parents’ for the weekend).

And then, THIS SUNDAY CANCELLED LAH!

ZZZzzzzzzZZZzZzzz! =_=

But the weekend was awesome because we joined the Mission Seminar led by Ps. Dennis. He calls himself an egg - white outside, yellow inside, and insisted he’s Chinese. He speaks better Cantonese and Mandarin than any of us! Yeah, and he’s an American FYI.

So the seminar was truly eye opening! We had the honour to bring him out for dinner on Sunday with my family. And everyone was SOOOH AMUSED seeing him talking non- stop in Cantonese, espcially my grandma. LOL. He really rawks! For those of you who missed it, well you missed it! Haha! (No, I’m not laughing because you missed it, because that’s actually a sad thing that you missed it. but I was just laughing because I thought it was quite funny of me to say like that, you know - if you missed it, well you missed it… Geddit? OK neh mind lah! -_-)

And then Janvier, a fatherly African man (who has been forcing me albeit politely to speak French with him) brought his French Bible and showed me, which was really cool. I think I should start reading my Bible in French. That’s how Ps. Dennis learned his mandarin anyway! If an egg can learn Chinese, so can a banana learn French! Although… I’m not really a banana banana… -____-

Throughout the whole week I was terribly stressed with all the deadlines to meet and stuff. And worse, I had 2 food reviews to hand up with zero inspiration on how to do it! One being a Malay food resto, and I didn’t even touch the food because it was all cold and fishy smelling; and the other, being a steak house’s.

Me: Eh, my ed say I did a very good with the Malay food review. A stark contrast to reality, how I’ve been complaining about it. haha
Jason: ….
Me: Ello? Are you listening to me?
Jason: Yeah! I’m just thinking.
Me: About what?
Jason: That in that case, you’re a very good bull-shitter.

-_-

Die or not, this sorta spouse? Argh!

I’ve never had so many courses of steaks in my entire life, at one go! We had like 2 appetisers, 1 big serving of chowder, 1 lamb shank, 1 fillet steak, 1 rib eye, 1 seafood platter, and 4 desserts! And I’m not talking about sharing the food with a table of 3 persons. I’m talking about each of us getting 1 full serving each of the above! And I finished everything! I mean, how can you let Wagyu Beef go to waste right? It was sooooo tasty! The wagyu beef thing.

Go check out my magazine this August! It’s a bumper issue with lotsa stuff in there! Best of all, its free! So, yeah, FREE. Malaysians, its FREE. You like it, no?

And then on the same day, my colleagues and I went out for dinner at Bumbu Bali or something, to celebrate someone’s birthday, and the birthday girl was so moody the whole day. Almost like walking on eggshells around her. -____-

And I didn’t eat anything cos I was just so filled to the brim! So I had a Virgin Margarita instead! My fav fav fav drink! I like the salty brim of the glass. Hehe! I rweally like it you know, except the drink comes with shaved bits of lime skin. Blah. That, I don’t like!

Oh there was one night I reached home from work, made tuna and egg sandwich for dinner, and then went straight to bed and didn’t wake up until the next day at 6:15am, which was time for work. Although Jason was saying in the middle of the night I yelled at him for not blanketing me because I was cold. LOL. I is rule! Yes, R.U.L.E. Not RUDE lah ding dong!

Oh hey, I finally managed to use up my DC SUPERHEROES VOUCHER! WHOO HOO! But there’s nothing much to buy there? Like, I spent an hour or so just sifting through the tees. And it’s so… boring.

So in the end, I bought 2 superman t-shirts: 1 black tee with a huge ass gold Superman logo, and the other a military print. 1 mini denim skirt (no, ming yan, the skirt doesn’t come with lace trimmings, or whatever you call it), and one leather belt.

The belt costs a hefty 60 bucks and it doesn’t come with the buckle. O_o Can you imagine that? The buckle alone is hundred over bucks already. LOCO! comprende? LOCO! Oh I have a Super Girl buckle at home already, so I didn’t need to buy the buckle lah.

And the next day I proudly wear my Superman black-tee-gold-logo to work and the next thing you know, my ed also wear another Superman tee to work (we both attended the event together so obviously we both got the same goody bag). I was like, why you don’t let me know first?!!!! And he was like slapping his forehead all the way and kept lamenting how I know wohhhh.

Grrrr.

We didn’t go out for lunch that day. We all tapau-ed and ate in the office. Cis! I don’t want to wear superman clothes anymore!

OK, I HAVE to stop here or I’ll never will. Its way over my working hours ade! How can I be so hardworking?!

Give yourself a pat on my behalf for reading this far! You know I lub you long time! :D

TA!