Monday, May 14, 2012

Stolen Moments

I received an sms from a dear friend last evening, wishing me happy mother's day. Now throughout the day, friends' have been coming up to me wishing me the same and for lame-joking sake, I'd reply oh dear please don't remind me! I know. Don't ask me why I always, ALWAYS like to say lame things and embarrass myself like that! Ugh. Anyway, so when I was replying this particular sms, saying thank you, suddenly it hit me. I realized that, yes, I am actually, happy. Happy!

Not oh-boy-i'm-alive-everyday-cracking-head-what-to-cook-do-laundry-clean-up-shit-yay-i'm-loving-it kinda happy; but I am just, happy. Happy being where I am now, this moment. A wife, not a terribly good one at that, but a wife nonetheless, a mother (!), that fact that I am figuring things out (and the big picture's getting clearer) finally on how to move on and achieve goals socially, financially, personally, and uh, career-ly and I'm ready for that! And that caught me by surprise, because I've always thought I'm in such a rut, that I'm forever in that much dreaded waiting phase, waiting for that big break, only I didn't realize that that big break is now.

Now. I mean, every moment at home with my two girls is a milestone that says something big about their growth and I get to be part of it! Every decision made (and quarrel!) with the hubs about petty or important stuff says something big about a relationship shared for x amount of years. Every meltdown I experience says something big about the maturity process of my womanhood.

And one more big break? That in that split second, I'm finally coming to terms with myself, my family, my life. And I like it. I feel assured that, slowly but surely, things are falling into its rightful places, that I should really cut myself some slack and just at times, go with the flow, albeit patiently. So yeah. Happy. I am.

look who's peeking out and over the cot!

Jenny from the block

Breton stripe top from Azorias. Love it!

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